So I guess now I can write about my life more, since the state can’t re-license us as foster parents, which means no kids in my home that I have to preserve privacy rights for (too bad, though, you get to hear about my own kids whenever I want to write about them!). Apparently if you cannot support your family financially WITHOUT the foster care monthly disbursements, then you are not allowed to be foster parents. Since my husband lost his job back in February, that means we are basically untouchables. The state had to remove the girls from our home, to a new set of foster parents, all because this economy is crud.
My poor husband is feeling even more stress and pressure, growing pretty much exponentially day by day – he has had 52 interviews since he was laid off. It’s been about 25 weeks. More than 2 interviews a week, not counting phone interviews. He has been applying for dozens of jobs a day, hundreds of jobs a week. His resume has been chosen as “one of the top 2 or 3 candidates” a few different times now, and so far they have always chosen “the other guy.” Well, that’s great for him, but I’m starting to feel like it needs to be my husband’s turn to be “the other guy.”
Right now he is at some sort of working interview – he’s going in to work a half day, then do a presentation on what he learned. I hope that he does well – he gets nervous speaking on the fly in front of crowds, but I also know that he is determined to do whatever must be done to get a job, even (or especially) if it involves going outside of his comfort zone.
So sad that an intelligent, educated, well experienced guy like him has to be dragged through the mud and made to feel like he is worthless because someone is always “better suited for the position” than him.
I also applied for a few jobs on campus. If there’s something I can do while the kids are at school, that can bring in enough money to help even a little bit, I’ll do it. I haven’t heard back yet, but at least I know I have experience in one of the jobs I applied for – newspaper delivery for the school paper! At least doing it for the school will be infinitely easier than doing it for the Daily Herald, Deseret News, Salt Lake Tribune, USA Today, and NY Times(yes, all at once. That was insane.).
My baby Tink is starting kindergarten, and my little Peter Pan is starting second grade. I really liked being room mom last year, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it this school year – maybe for Pan’s class, I can do all the room mom stuff in the afternoon when I don’t have school myself.
This year, the kids get a new experience – school breakfast. One of my classes starts at 8 am, and so I’m going to get the kids in the breakfast program so that on Tuesdays and Thursdays I can drop them off on my way to school. At least it means a little less work for me in the morning, since I won’t have to cajole them into eating before we have to leave… I just need to get them dressed and over to the school before they complain too much about being hungry!
Oh, and haha. I just noticed that I’ve mentioned me going to school a few times, but I don’t think I’ve written much about that here on the blog – back in April, I attended a foster care symposium, and one of the speakers told us not to let caring for traumatized kids get us burnt out, and another told us to accomplish our dreams, and don’t talk ourselves out of it. Well I already knew I was queen of convincing myself not to do things, so my husband told me to just go for it. I initially had things set up to go to summer semester, but with my last foster care case that ended up being impossible. So in a way, having the foster kids go is a blessing, because it opened up fall semester for me. I’m going back for a Bachelor’s of Music Education, back on the road I started on waaaay back in 1999 at CSULA.
So that puts me here, in this new position of mom and student. If I can do this, and get everything done in the next 2 or 3 years, then I will become a teacher and can bring a lot of blessings to both the community I teach in, and to my family. If we are ever put in a position again where my husband is laid off, then we can have my education and career to fall back on.
Right now it’s kind of like I’m sitting in one of those white water rafting boats, floating in a lull, but able to see the rapids ahead. It’s going to be wild, scary, and probably at least a little dangerous, but afterwards the experience will bless me (as long as I manage not to lose anyone over the side of the raft along the way!).
Wish us luck!
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